You know since Mr. Canon came into our lives mid-December I have not just talked.. I have been busy putting pictures out there.. and I know some of you have minds like 2nd graders, if there are NO pictures, then we tune out!
Still with me? ;) Haha.
I sat in class today and watched videos of teachers using word boards, and etc. I will not bore you with the details, but the problem was: I WAS BORED with the concept of teaching!
Yes, I know.. I am in the program to do this.. one year from now I will so stinkin close to graduation I will be able to smell it… but I am still very hesitant. I cannot tell if I am nervous because I don’t want to teach, or if I KNOW that there are going to be a MILLION new things between now and one year from now. I will be teaching lessons (that I have NEVER taught before), meeting new teachers, administration, and I know this might sound silly, but DRIVING to a new school for the first time will be more than my nerves or stomach can bare… I mean C’Mon the interview process must be killer. . .
Can I do this? Will I make it? Am I MEANT to do this???? Today I was sunken with the reality that this college stuff comes to an end, and I will be a responsible ADULT with like, a, …… real grown up JOB! hello!!! IM SCARED!
Then I think of this sweet smile of his, and I want so badly to help us out financially, and be on the same sleep pattern as he is.. then…. at the same time I hope I get to be a mommy to his beautiful children one day…. (Will I want to teach?) Will I have enough energy/time to serve him fully? Don’t mean to give TOO MUCH INFORMATION… BUT….. I want to available for him in his times of “need.” Will I have enough left in me?
Guys.. this is a huge time for me.. and as every day passes the burden gets heavy.. MY LIFE IS ABOUT TO CHANGE… and frankly…. I am pretty OK with the way things are… :)
Ok… I think I am done….